Right so it is in the spiritual course, whoso hath grace, be it never so little, and wittingly leaveth it, and the working upon it, and putteth himself to the exercise or practice of another kind, for which he hath not as yet received a gift or grace, but doth it only because he seeth, readeth, or heareth that some others do so, he may perhaps run awhile till he be weary and then will he turn home again, and if he be not the more wary, may hurt his feet with such fancies before he get home. But he that continueth working upon such grace as he hath, and humbly beggeth by prayer perseverantly for more, and after feeleth his heart stirred to follow after the grace which he desired, he may securely run, if he keep himself humble. Therefore, desire of God as much as thou wilt or canst, without measure or moderation at all concerning any thing that belongs to His love or Heaven’s bliss, for he that can desire most of God shall feel and receive most; but work as thou mayest and cry God mercy, for that thou canst not do. Thus St Paul seems to mean, when he said: Every one hath a proper gift of God, one so, and another so. (John Climacus)

I admire the spiritual calm of others. I am not calm.

I admire the spiritual patience of others. I am not patient.

I admire the spiritual detachment of others. I am not detached.

Rather than running after these gifts - which I have not been given - it would be better to cultivate the excitement, urgency, engagement and other gifts that God has given.

None of our gifts are given in isolation. My urgency will be balanced by the patience of another. But his or her patience depends on my urgency for the wholeness of God to be known.