If you long for God, you must drive out your love for family. Anyone telling you he can combine these yearnings is deceiving himself. "No one can serve two masters". "I did not come to bring peace on earth," says the Lord, knowing how parent would rise up against sons or brothers who chose to serve Him. "It was for war and the sword," to separate the lovers of God from the lovers of the world, the materially-minded from spiritually minded, the vainglorious from the humble. (John Climacus)

Scripture makes a strong case for John's specific critique of family. In the twelfth chapter of Matthew Jesus' rejection of family seems very sharp. Paul's expectation of an imminent parousia also discouraged marriage and child-bearing.

Family is demanding and distracting. Love of family can become a kind of idol. But I am not sure family is uniquely tempting. The single, childless, and deeply religious can easily find obsessions just as distant from God's intent.

Jesus did speak of separating sheep from goats. But he brought together Jews, Samaritans, Greeks and more. Jesus did not remain in the desert, but came back to home, family, and his own region. Whenever two or three are gathered together, he is with us.

The intimacy - and insistent demands - of family can be a fertile context for framing and anchoring our relationship with God. Finding the discipline, vulnerability, and love to allow God to be the master of our family might make the monastery seem more like a spa in comparison.

Any fascination has the potential to be sinful. In every challenge is a sacramental opportunity. It depends on how we engage God in the relationship.