The state of love may be recognized in the giving of money, and still more in the giving of spiritual counsel and in looking after people in their physical needs. (Maximos the Confessor)

Yesterday my wife and I discussed the pledge we will make to the church for the year ahead.

In recent years we have given more than ten percent of our pre-tax income. We have not increased our pledge for at least three years. But we have continued to give the same amount as our income fell.

I will not be in church today to participate in stewardship Sunday. I am in meetings to plan mass casualty care for a large city. My profession involves looking after people's physical needs.

In neither case do I feel "in love." In each case it is more a matter of there being a need, an opportunity to contribute to filling the need, and a disciplined process of applying resource to need and opportunity.

That sounds soulless and cold. But I wonder if we too often mistake love for a fervor that is more self-affirming than self-giving.